Do you have good habits or do you have bad habits? Habits are one of those things you do that will define your destiny.
There is an old quote that says that habits define your destiny…
And that quote is mostly true.
You are what you repeatedly do, after all.
What you repeatedly do will define the quality of your life.
This is why there are already so many books and research written about building habits and those books sell really well.
Your habits will literally define how your life is going to be in the next few decades.
So if you want a better life in the next coming yours and you’re willing to be patient, build new good habits.
They will take time to build and they have different timelines for all people.
But how do we build new habits exactly?
Here are some simple ways you can do it.
- Pick Only ONE Habit
Picking only one habit to start with will increase the chances of you sticking with it.
If you pick more than one, or worse more than 3, you’ll have a much harder time sticking with them and focusing.
You’ll be all over the place. You will end up procrastinating.
There’s also a much higher chance that you’ll get burned out or you’ll quit when you can’t keep up with building more than one habit.
It’s best to focus on one to make sure that it will become a long-term habit.
If you think there are multiple habits you need to work on, prioritize the most important one right now.
ACTION STEP: Make a list of 3-5 habits you want to build.
Out of those 3-5, pick the most important one.
Carefully choose which habit will give you the most benefit and will change your life for the better quickly once you built it.
- Start REALLY Small
When starting a new habit, you don’t want to start big.
This will overwhelm you easily.
Imagine starting the new habit of running and immediately going for a 2-hour run on your first day.
How do you think that will end up?
When you start small, you’re easing yourself into it.
You’re making sure that it builds up slowly but more surely.
But we want to make it so easy and small that anyone can do it.
This will make sure that building the new habit will stick easily.
For the running habit example – You can run for only 5 minutes or even less.
Yes, you heard it right, this will ensure that the habit you started sticks.
You might be thinking – “Isn’t that actually too small to start?”
You won’t be running for that small amount of time forever.
The plan is to keep going with that 5-minute run until it comes easy for you.
Then you want to increase it slowly.
Make it 6 minutes, then 7, then 10, then 20, then 30, until you’re able to run for 1-2 hours a few times a week.
Another good example would be starting to read a book.
You don’t want to start by reading 5 chapters a day.
Read only 1 page per day.
Once that comes easy, read 2, then 3, then 5, until you’re reading more than a chapter per day.
The goal is to make it easy at the start and then build it up.
ACTION STEP: On the habit you picked earlier, think of the easiest step you can take on day one.
It has to be easy that most people can do it.
Only increase the amount after you get used to that easy step per day or per week.
- Break The Habit Into Separate Parts
It becomes much easier if you break the habit into separate parts rather than one big whole.
For the reading example, instead of reading 10 pages a day straight, you can read 5 pages in the morning, then 5 pages at night.
When you go to the gym regularly, this will sound familiar. It’s the concept of “sets and reps.”
When you work out the bench press, you don’t just do it in 1 set right?
You usually do 3 sets of between 5-12 reps.
It’s the same concept of breaking it down into separate parts.
Think of it like progressive overload at the gym. That’s exactly how you want to approach this.
Let’s say you want to do 20 push-ups per day.
You want to do two separate sets of 10 push-ups twice a day.
This will make the habit much easier and less stressful to stick to.
ACTION STEP: For the habit you picked, break it down into separate parts.
For example, if you picked reading, then break it down to reading a set of pages twice or thrice a day.
10 pages a day turns into 3 pages in the morning, afternoon, and 4 pages at night.
If you picked meditation, then 5 minutes a day turns into 2 minutes during the morning and 3 minutes during the evening.
Breaking down habits into separate parts will make things easier and more sustainable.
- Prepare For Obstacles Or Failures
Like all things, there will be learning curves.
There will be times when you fail or forget to do the habit.
Outside factors can derail you from doing the habit on certain days like family, school, work, chores, travel etc.
It’s important to prepare to fail.
Nobody is immune to failing at something new.
Don’t postpone the inevitable and think of all the scenarios where things can go wrong.
Then prepare for those bad scenarios, and watch as how it will be much easier for you to stick to building your new habit.
ACTION STEP: For the habit you picked, list down at least 5-10 scenarios or situations that can prevent you from sticking to it every single day.
Then list down on another page, how you’ll be able to deal with those scenarios and still be able to stick with your new habit.
- Make The Habit More Fun
It’s much easier to do fun things compared to doing things you don’t like.
Unfortunately, some habits are downright boring and can make it much harder for you to stick to.
But, there are multiple ways to do one habit.
Example, if you want to exercise more during the week but find going to the gym and lifting weights a bore, then join martial arts classes, you’ll be able to have fun, meet new people, and learn an important skill like self-defense at the same time!
If you want to meditate more but find it boring, grab your phone and headphones, and search for relaxing music that you prefer.
If you want to read more, then try to find something to learn in every few pages or chapter, or if you’re reading non-fiction then imagine yourself in the perspective of the main character.
ACTION STEP: For the habit you picked, list down at least 3 ways you can make it more fun for yourself.
Make sure what you listed is actually fun for YOU, not for other people.
- Repeat Steps 1-6 For A New Habit
Repeat these steps until you form the habit. Until it becomes automatic for you.
Don’t be afraid to start again, especially if the habit is really important to you.
Take note that the amount of time it takes to build a habit is different for everyone.
One person might take only 21 days, and another person might take a whole year to build one habit permanently.
Remember that these steps can be applied to absolutely any habit you choose.
If possible, get a close friend to hold you accountable for your habits.
My Personal Habits and What Worked For Me
DISCLAIMER: I will be sharing what has worked for me. What worked for me may not work for you and that is okay. I encourage everybody to do what works best for them.
After all, everybody has different circumstances, goals and timelines.
To get my habits to stick, I use an app called HabitShare which allows me to track all of my habits on the app and I can check them off after completing the task for the day.
Oh, and that’s not even the best part. The app also allows you to see your friend’s habits and it’s a great way for friends to hold each other accountable.
A good friend of mine Ammar, who runs the YouTube channel AS eSkater actually recommended me the app and it’s been a complete game changer for me.
I found myself procrastinating FAR less compared to before and I’ve been able to keep on top of all the good habits I set myself to develop.
These are some of the habits I currently practice in my day to day life:
- Meditation (5-30 minutes)
- Journalling (Gratitude, Positive Affirmations, What I accomplished for the day)
- Reading books (one chapter / 20 minutes minimum) every day
- Learning new skills through video tutorials and courses (Udemy, Fiverr Learning, YouTube, Teachable, etc.)
- Gym session (Weightlifting, Cardio)
- Boxing
- Freelancing (Reaching out to clients, updating my website, responding to messages and e-mails etc.)
- Skincare routine (I personally use Bulldog products in the UK)
Your list may look either similar or completely different to me and that’s totally okay. I encourage you to pursue a habit that works for YOU.
There’s a couple of books I will recommend that has helped me A LOT with building habits and staying on the right track that has changed the trajectory of my life
- Atomic Habits – James Clear
- Compound Effect – Darren Hardy
- The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do, and How to Change – Charles Duhigg
- The Almanack of Naval Ravikant: A Guide to Wealth and Happiness – Eric Jorgenson
The habits you have will be the difference between a happy and unhappy life and I encourage you to think LONG-TERM.
If your current habits aren’t serving you, I would encourage you to take a step back and consider doing a Cost/Benefit Analysis where you assess the short-term and long-term costs and benefits of a habit.
Some bad habits that come to my mind which may feel good in the short-term but will be detrimental in the long-run:
- Excessive alcohol consumption (I personally don’t drink any alcohol myself but for the majority reading this, limiting this to 2 drinks on social occasions will be fine if you really don’t want to quit alcohol completely)
- Smoking cigarettes
- Watching pornography (I would recommend reading ‘The Porn Pandemic by Andrew Ferebee‘)
- Procrastination (Recommended reading: ‘Eat that frog – Brian Tracy‘)
- Binge watching TV shows (One episode a day will be fine but spending the whole day watching TV series will be detrimental in the long-run)
Build That Habit Now And Change Your Life!
It’s mostly true that your habits will define your destiny.
If you have a lot of bad habits, I urge you to swap them for new and better habits.
It’s a promise that your life will become so much more fulfilling if you have a few good habits ingrained in you.
Don’t give up on ever building that good habit if you are sure that it will change your life for the better.
Start today, don’t waste any time now. Once you waste time, there’s no going back.
One of the biggest regrets from elder people is wasting time and when you get to that age, you’ll only be wishing you had more time.
With technology like social media, it’s far too easy to waste time and hours scrolling through content and procrastinating on the important tasks that need to be done.
Sadly, we don’t have superpowers like the Flash or Superman to turn back the clock.
If you want a good routine, it all starts with your habits.
Start changing your life TODAY.
What determines the trajectory of your life will be the things you do OUTSIDE of your 9-5 job.
I hope that this post will help you in your journey.
May the best be with you.
Written by Baz Kannan. Edited by Kevin Pinili.
